callao salvaje teneriffa, Callao Salvaje, Spain
What is Emotional Intelligence?
Emotional Intelligence refers to a person’s ability to understand and perceive their own and other people’s emotions, empathize under challenging situations, interact with other people, and control emotional impulses.
Nowadays, the main focus seems to lie on the development of only the intellectual abilities of children. This happens as a result of social pressure: it is generally accepted that feelings and emotions do not need special training. But such a stereotype may subsequently lead to psychosomatic disorders, which can manifest themselves in a child at any age.
Therefore, it is essential to correctly distribute efforts between the development of emotional and academic intelligence. Let's not put off emotional education “for later”. It should be started as early as possible, and it will be much easier for the child to adapt in society, communicate with peers and older children, make friends and maintain trusting relationships with parents.
Emotional Intelligence in children looks like this:
• Developing emotional awareness – first of their own feelings, then emotions in others
• Recognizing, identifying, or perceiving emotions – as well as understanding what a feeling is, they’ll learn to grasp what facial expressions mean, body language, tone of voice, and so forth. They can attribute these to others, and eventually label these as “happy”, “angry”, “sad”
• Describing feelings – as well as naming emotions, they’ll learn how to use emotional vocabulary to convey how they feel
• Empathizing with others’ feelings – related to the above, this will at some point extend to feeling concern when others aren’t A-OK, or feeling sympathy for animals
• Controlling and managing their emotions – learning (and applying the knowledge) about when it’s suitable to act or react when they feel something
• Understanding what causes feelings – both in themselves and in others; and
• Understanding emotion-behaviour linkages – e.g. “Dad kicked the wall because he’s mad”.
Over the course of several, well-structured classes, I will teach and discuss with the children what Emotional Intelligence is, how it helps us in our everyday lives, and how to build and grow it. I will include fun exercises and activities to deepen the understanding of the concept in a playful, child-friendly way.
The classes will cover the five basic parts of Emotional Intelligence:
1. Self-awareness: When people know what they’re feeling at a particular time and understand how their moods affect others.
2. Self-regulation: When people can control how they respond to their emotions. They consider possible consequences before acting on impulse.
3. Motivation: When people can accomplish goals in spite of negative or distracting feelings they may be having.
4. Empathy: When people can understand how others feel.
5. Social skills: When people can manage relationships. They know what kind of behaviours get a positive response from others.
Apart from classes focusing on Emotional Intelligence, I offer consultations for parents and their children in my capacity as a certified child, adolescent and parent counsellor.
Especially with children and teenagers, qualified professionals can be a bridge between the child and the parents and help all involved deal with hard subjects, or simply with the everyday struggles which plainly being human and growing up bring with them.
Counselling for children is effective with:
Divorce or separation
Death of a loved one
Trauma
Bullying
Sexual abuse
Emotional abuse
Physical abuse
Family or child relocation
Substance abuse or addiction in the family
Mental illnesses, like depression, anxiety, and obsessive-compulsive disorder
The above indications can lead to a variety of issues, such as:
Persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness
Constant anger and a tendency to overreact to situations
Preoccupation with physical illness or their own appearance
An inability to concentrate, think clearly or make decisions
An inability to sit still
Diets or binging behaviour
Violent acts
Unwarranted aggression
Incontinence
Difficulty adjusting to social situations
Frequent nightmares and sleep difficulties
A sudden drop in grades at school
Persistent worry and anxiety
Withdrawing from activities they normally enjoy
Loss of appetite or dramatic weight loss/gain
Performing obsessive routines like hand washing
Expressing thoughts of suicide
Social isolation and wanting to be alone
Alcohol or drug use
Increased physical complaints despite a normal, healthy physician’s report
Self-harm such as cutting
Apart from situation-specific goals, child counselling focuses on:
Building the child’s self-esteem
Helping to improve the child’s communication skills
Stimulating healthy, normal development
Building an appropriate emotional repertoire
Improving the child’s emotional vocabulary
I aim to offer a safe space and an empathetic ear while providing tools to help facilitate change in thoughts, feelings, and behaviours. I help the child focus on resolving conflict, understanding their own thoughts and feelings, and thinking of new solutions to their daily problems, and help them understand what is happening and that they are not alone.
If you have any questions, don't hesitate to contact me on +34 722 287 111 or sonja.lowicki@gmail.com, or visit my Facebook page Corazón y Mente Counselling.
I'm looking forward to hearing from you and working with you and your child!
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